Branding yourself

Nowadays, we are surrounded by messages insisting on the positive effects of establishing a brand value for anything we want to sell to a target audience. Of course people are not products, and things like friendship or feelings cannot be bought or sold, but there is an idea we can extract from that branding philosophy in order to apply it to our online love search; basically, that the way we "display" ourselves has to be positive, show a certain originality, convey personality and impress those who explore our profile on the online dating website, as genuine.

When we are building or trying to sharpen a profile, doubts may arise in the form of "If I mention that, I will look less attractive", "What could I include to positively attract attention?", "I do not know how to put forth this feature, hobby, skill, etc. so that it sounds interesting" and similar considerations. After all, we all have our defects, our peculiarities and idiosyncrasies, and loads of characteristics, behaviors and tastes so perfectly ordinary that we usually tag them as average, gray or even boring. Let us explain with examples.

Take a hypothetical single man hoping to date single women through a Christian dating website who is to include in his profile the next personal information: having brown eyes and hair, working in the videogame industry, spending part of his free time going out with his friends, volunteering at a neighborhood library. He is naturally concerned, as he wants to positively impress the single women who explore the website's profiles, and might be having thoughts like these about the previous personal data: "most single guys here will have the same eye and hair color, I will not stand out thus", "if I say I work with videogames, they might think me the typical geek", "girls might fear conflicts between our dates and going out with my friends", "they would certainly consider I am a sort of bookworm".

Let us see the big difference between those ideas and the following attitude, applied to the same example. If our single feels poetic, he could say something like "abundant/soft/beautiful hair of a light/ashen/honey brown" and "warm, eloquent eyes of a deep brown". If this description sounds a bit embarrassing to him, he could mention that a friend suggested the terms, or that a someone sometime described him that way. The fact remains that, when adding words which transmit aesthetically pleasant sensations (color, texture, shine, etc.), or attractive behaviors (personal care, having good taste), the picture changes dramatically. Another option is to calmly assume that having brown eyes and hair is a positive asset in itself: online dating websites are peopled by lots of women who show a preference for these physical features in their dream single.

Regarding his job, he could say something like "I have the luck of doing something I like, as I am working in the videogame industry: this allows for daily fun challenges, and I share my working time with a dynamic and special team". As we see here, it all goes about describing, in the best possible light, what we want to say about ourselves. Of course, you should not invent anything or be insincere: falsehood and half truths are huge mistakes, as nobody likes being told lies, and truth will always come to light. To continue with our example, if his job is provisional, unsatisfactory, monotonous, with a not-too-pleasant-atmosphere, etc. he could say something like "I presently work in the audiovisual business, but the job is somewhat static and there are other areas, more in line with my skills and ambitions, where I would like to try my luck": the message about himself would then be positive.

This type of exercises are really helpful to enhance the way we look at ourselves and present ourselves to others: practice a little, and you will gradually find easier the creation of a successful "personal brand" & a "killer profile" in your Christian dating website.


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